I’ve never asked her about her height. I’ve never had to since she is the tallest person I know, and getting the exact number would probably make me feel even shorter. Already in her mid-thirties, she has the maturity of someone much older and the kindness and open arms of someone much, much younger. Unlike many other twenty-somethings who fervently admire waifish celebrities, I have been in complete awe of Kay since the day I met her in late May of last year.
There is no particular quirk that I can pinpoint and say, “Yes, this is why”. There is no why, or rather, there are too many to list. “I really like the way I look.” She told me this week, when talking about how her doctor had asked her to lose weight. “I wouldn’t do it if it weren’t for my health. I think I’m attractive. I like the way I look with clothes and without clothes.” It’s a sort of unabashed self-confidence that comes off as something completely natural and far from ever being arrogant. She is not thin and she sports a very curly pixie cut, her hair a bleached blond with black roots starting to suffer, which led me to constantly comparing her to a sheep when we first met. At the time she laughed and accepted it, and I’ve never seen her with a gloomy face, even when I know for a fact that things are not alright.
The thing about Kay that manages to round up all of the facts and explain quite clearly why I put her on such a pedestal is that she simply inspires me. She knows who she is, what she wants, and she loves it. She is a giver, not a taker, and an absolute genius at everything she puts her hands to, whether it be graphic design or, say, sound engineering. “I love cooking!” Oh yeah, that too. When she said this, I was stuffing my face with chocolate and chilli pudding, with bonus custard, that she’d made herself the night before.
Kay is not perfect. I’ve only stayed with her for a week at max so I would probably find faults and argue if we did live together. But out of everyone I know – and do not know – she is the person that I wish I could be more similar to, the person who inspires me the most and, above all, the person whom I hope to become. “I feel very blessed.” She told me, when talking about friends the other day. “That I have all these wonderful people who care so much for me without me having to ask.” She doesn’t realize that there is a reason for that.